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Brian Griffin
' Brian Griffin' is an 8-year old talking white Labrador who has lived with the Griffin family since Peter picked him up as a stray. He also possesses various anthropomorphic qualities, such as the ability to speak intelligently, drive a car, and walk bipedally. Earlier in the series, he used the catch phrase "Whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry martini around here?". He also has a particularly sharp wit. Peter is his best friend, despite Brian's vastly superior intelligence - on several occasions, Brian has had to explain Peter's inability to do various things, such as haggling over prices. Bio Brian was born on a farm in Austin, Texas, in a litter of five puppies. His mother was named Biscuit, his father was a dog named Coco. He was apparently abandoned by his mother, which lead to most of his personal problems. In "Don't Make Me Over", he is embarrassed for hostility barking at a famous rapper and blamed his upbringing by his father Coco. At the end of the episode he becomes enraged because he is thinks that the camera man is shocked because he turned off a black TV program and explains that he only turns it off because he's tired and not because it's a black show. He is said to be 8 years old in "The Man with Two Brians". When reunited with his first owner in "Road to Rhode Island".. In the same episode, he discovers that his mother died and was made into a table. Brian and Stewie steal the body and give it a funeral, for which Stewie made a good-intentioned but insensitive requiem of how nice of a table she was. In "Brian Goes Back to College", it is revealed that Brian went to Brown University in Rhode Island, but did not graduate. Brian has a cultured background; he loves opera and jazz (he is a fan of John Coltrane) speaks fluent French and Tagalog, and is competent in Spanish. He is also a member of Mensa. He loves to sing and can imitate a barbershop quartet without accompaniment. He is an avid writer, having once been invited to write for The New Yorker, although he was fired once the magazine learned he did not graduate from college. He has also written a novel, although has made little progress other than the title Faster Than the Speed of Love, and a synopsis similar to the film "Iron Eagle III" (for which Stewie and Lois mock him) and has since been brought up several times throughout the series. He is a smoker, an alcoholic and recovered cocaine addict (he briefly relapsed in one episode after becoming a cocaine-sniffing dog for the local police department). Brian discovered that his cocaine habit stemmed from his mother abandoning him for which he saw a therapist. He has also made references to either buying, being in possession of, or smoking marijuana in numerous episodes. In "420" he actually does a whole dance to the song A Bag of Weed. In "It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One", it is revealed he has a Ziggy tattoo. It is shown in "Brian & Stewie" he keeps a gun just in case he wants to commit suicide. In earlier episodes, Brian showed some belief in God: In "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'", when Peter was in denial about God's plagues and insisted that there was a logical explanation for them, Brian slapped him repeatedly and stated, "You want an explanation? God is pissed!"; in "Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington", he is shown reading a Bible; in "The Thin White Line", he thanks God for giving him his sense of smell; in "Boys Do Cry," he attends church with the other Griffins; in "Lethal Weapons", he calls Stewie an antichrist. Additionally, in "April in Quahog", he is seen praying, but is quick to deny it when questioned by Stewie. After the doomsday threat is revealed to be an April Fools joke, he leaves to go to perform charity at a local soup kitchen as he had apparently promised God. Brian for most part is very well liked by a majority of the characters. It appears the only exception is Quagmire who it is revealed in "Jerome Is the New Black" dislikes him completely. When Brian asks why, Glenn proceeds to points out every single mistake, hypocrisy and selfish actions Brian has ever presented, from being a hypocritical hyper-liberal, to mocking anyone for believing in religion, to neglecting his teenaged son Dylan. A few of Quagmire's statements towards Brian are considered ironic, as Quagmire himself has done actions he berated Brian for. For example, Glenn points out Brian's romantic fixation for his best friend Peter's wife Lois as a reason, despite the fact that Glenn himself has been stalking Lois for many years now with more selfish intentions, though he also mentioned that it was a bad way of repaying Peter for taking in him in the house. Also, Brian showed genuine love and care for his neglected son Dylan when they reconciled in "The Former Life of Brian", while Quagmire pretty much ignored all of his children born from the women he has had sex with, such as Anna Lee Quagmire in Quagmire's Baby. A running joke on the show is Brian's inability to maintain a human girlfriend. Most of time this is usually due to bad advice given to him from Stewie, who constantly insists on nosing around in his relationships, though other times it is due to his own insecurity. The longest girlfriend he has had so far was Jillian, but the relationship ended after an attempt to move in together ended badly partially due to Stewie. When Jillian was announced to be married, Brian took one last shot to try and get her back but in the end she let him down gently and the marriage goes on as planned much to Brian's dismay. Griffin Family In an earlier episode, Brian suffers from incontinence due the stress of repressing his romantic feelings toward Lois. He initially tries to hide this condition by blaming it on Stewie, but is discovered when he has a public accident in the grocery store. Another example of Brian's "humanity" is his attraction to human women; Brian has dated several since the show began, and is deeply in love with Peter's wife. His age is usually treated differently depending on the joke. In "Brian in Love", he states: "I'm seven years old and if I play my cards right, I got seven more years ahead of me." Brian spent some time as a homeless stray washing car windshields for change before he met Peter, who offered him a home with his family in Quahog, Rhode Island. Prior to Brian, the Griffins had another talking dog named Todd, who was put down at the age of 15 due to illness. Other Information Despite his anthropomorphic intelligence, Brian shares certain traits and shortcomings with real dogs. For example, he cleans himself with his tongue and scratches at fleas with his hind leg. On the commentary of "Road to Rhode Island" he confirmed that he sees in black and white. He has a fear of the toilet flushing and of the vacuum despite vacuuming in "Fore Father". He also couldn't control his animal urges for the prized Pewterschmidt dog, Seabreeze. Furthermore, although his maturity and broad range of experiences seem to imply that he is as old as a middle aged human, as a dog he is only eight years old. Peter has been known to tease him about his shorter lifespan. In "Brian: Portrait of a Dog", he seems to have a 'midlife crisis'. He is also shown to have a liking for dog food at times. In "Chitty Chitty Death Bang", he chases the chuck wagon from the commercials for Purina Chuck Wagon and in "Barely Legal", he comes running with joy when Peter's daughter Meg shakes a bag of Dog Chow. In "The Thin White Line", Peter points out that Brian will die some 50 years before him. In "Blue Harvest", Brian, in character as Chewbacca, uncontrollably chases a pig's ear in a fit of barking. In "Breaking Out is Hard to Do", Brian is shown to have difficulty keeping his balance while riding in the back of a van; when questioned by Peter, Brian responds by pointing out he can't stand up straight due to his nature. In "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey", it is revealed that Brian is not potty trained but rather defecates outside like other dogs. Tired of stepping in his feces, Lois forces him to wear diapers, which he finds extremely humiliating. Amused, Stewie says that he looks "silly" in his diapers but tells him that it won't be so bad once he gets used to them. Brian eventually gets out of diapers by simply defecating in Mayor West's garden instead, leading Lois to think he is potty-trained. Brian seems somewhat ashamed of his dog instincts and insecure about his canine status in general. In "Brian: Portrait of a Dog", he refused to perform degrading pet tricks for Peter during a dog show, despite it being necessary to win the money needed to buy the family a new air conditioner. He also chastised Lady and the Tramp for acting in typical dog-like behavior, saying that "that's just what they want you to do." He suffers mistreatment as a dog, and is humiliated when the Griffins catch him with canine pornography. In "Brian & Stewie", he admits to Stewie that he can't find a purpose in his life, and keeps a gun in his safety deposit box in case he ever decides to commit suicide. "Dog Gone" however, cements how important Brian is to the Griffin family, and makes him realize that his existence has meaning to them. Brian occasionally displays racist tendencies, which he claims he gets from his father. In "Chick Cancer", Stewie asks Brian a rhetorical question along the lines of "What kind of man would I be if I ran off now?" to which Brian replies "You'd be a black man," which shocked Stewie. However, in "Peter's Two Dads", Brian is taken aback after Peter says that he acquired crack cocaine "from Black's," referring to a "white guy selling crack behind Black's Hardware Store." Brian seems normally comfortable around Cleveland and the Brown family. However, when working as a cab driver, Brian gets in trouble anyway for not picking up Cleveland, stating his hurry to run an errand for Lois as an obvious excuse. Brian tells Lois he'll pick up the milk at the end of his shift because he's "gotta go... first fare of the night." When he pulls over and looks at Cleveland, he changes his mind and remarks "I should really pick up that milk now before I forget." Cleveland calls Brian ,throws a rock at the cab, and smashes it later in the episode. In "Peter's Got Woods", Brian dates a black woman named Shauna Parks, to whom he often nervously rambles about how much he likes African-Americans. He even requests to change "James Woods High School" to "Martin Luther King High School" in order to impress her. Also, in Something, Something, Something, Dark Side, when it was noted tha tLando Calrissian, portrayed by Mort Goldman was a black person, Brian, portraying Chewbacca said, "Let's hope the only one, right?" Brian is notably intelligent, enjoying renowned works of art such as the opera Carmen and the works of Fyodor Dostoyevsky. He has also heavily invested in the stock market, and collects first editions of literary classics. In "Meet the Quagmires" he is shown to be able to play the guitar and keytar. Also, he is shown playing drums in "McStroke". His intellectual bent makes it very difficult for him to form romantic relationships with people, leading to his constant failures with women, highlighted in "Valentine's Day in Quahog". Brian held several jobs while living in Los Angeles including being a waiter, car wash attendant, screenwriter and pornographic film director. He does not hold steady employment in Quahog, although did once become a substitute teacher at Buddy Cianci Junior High School as well as short stints as a taxi driver in "Deep Throats" and police officer for the Quahog Police Department as a drug sniffing dog in "The Thin White Line". He left the police force after becoming addicted to cocaine. Nevertheless, he is able to afford a car, pay bills to which some are payed to supposedly another family, and maintain a credit card. As the most sensible member of the Griffin family, Brian often serves as the voice of reason or as a mediator during family arguments. He is also usually the first one to realize that there is impending danger. Because of his intelligence and dry, deadpan manner, Brian sometimes acts as the "straight man" of the show. Brian is a rationalist and is often critical of organized religion; when Francis Griffin physically threatens him in "The Father, the Son, and the Holy Fonz", Brian sarcastically replies, "That's very Christian; believe what I say or I'll hurt you." It is revealed in "Love, Blactually" that he is an atheist like one Seth MacFarlane himself, who claims that this character represents him most. This was revealed where he is seen at the library and he is looking for The God Delusion by avowed humanist Richard Dawkins. His atheism comes under attack in "Not All Dogs Go To Heaven" when he comes out to the Griffins about his belief or lack of, and Meg, in a drastic effort to convert Brian to Christianity, makes his atheism public knowledge, making him a social outcast until near the end of the episode. In earlier episodes, Brian showed some belief in God: In "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'", when Peter was in denial about God's plagues and insisted that there was a logical explanation for them, Brian slapped him repeatedly and stated, "You want an explanation? God is pissed!"; in "Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington", he is shown reading a Bible; in "The Thin White Line", he thanks God for giving him his sense of smell; in "Boys Do Cry," he attends church with the other Griffins; in "Lethal Weapons", he calls Stewie an antichrist. Additionally, in "April in Quahog", he is seen praying, but is quick to deny it when questioned by Stewie. After the doomsday threat is revealed to be an April Fools joke, he leaves to go to perform charity at a local soup kitchen as he had apparently promised God. A running joke on the show is Brian's inability to maintain a human girlfriend. Most of time this is usually due to bad advice given to him from Stewie, who constantly insists on nosing around in his relationships, though other times it is due to his own insecurity. The longest girlfriend he has had so far was Jillian, but the relationship ended after an attempt to move in together ended badly partially due to Stewie. When Jillian was announced to be married, Brian took one last shot to try and get her back but in the end she let him down gently and the marriage goes on as planned much to Brian's dismay. Brian, for the most part, is very well liked by a majority of the characters. It appears the only exception isQuagmire who, it is revealed in "Jerome Is the New Black", dislikes him completely. When Brian asks why, Glenn proceeds to points out every single mistake, hypocritical and selfish action Brian has ever committed, from being a hypocritical hyper-liberal to mocking anyone for believing in religion and neglecting his teenaged son Dylan. When Brian decides to take Quagmire as a sucker to buy a dump of a condo in "Brian the Closer", Quagmire points out that even though he was a jerk when he was poor, he was at least honest about it instead of resulting to tricks such as hiding out for length of the escape clause in the contract. Brian expresses that Quagmire being the only one to point out his faults may make him his only true friend, but it turns out to be only a ruse to wait out the last few moments of the clause. Rivalry with The Dazzlings Death In Life of Brian, Stewie destroyed his own time machine and sent it to the junkyard. Brian notices a kid hockey net in good condition and convinces Stewie to take it back home. Before they could play, when Stewie was headed inside the house to get his knee pads, Brian was hit by a a fast moving car and had severely extensive injuries. The Griffin family and his adventure team saw him in the veterinarian's operating room, and Brian told them he loved them all before he died. Return from the dead In "Christmas Guy", two episodes after "Life of Brian", Stewie went back in time to save Brian Griffin when he was about to be hit by a car and it was lucky Brian was alive on Christmas Day. He is grateful for Stewie's actions, even though the Stewie of this timeline doesn't know about Brian's now-averted death. In Brian's Big Movie In this film, Brian tries to help out our heroes. But they won't let him, then soon Brian can hear our heroes talking to the Princesses. And Celestia said that: "Brian isn't really that special". Brian hears this, discouraged, heart broken, and destroyed, he leaves. The next morning, Thomas tries to talk to him, but Brian however just yelled and said: "I don't wanna talk to a useless, talking train!" (who thinks Thomas is part of this). And walks home. Then later, Tirek reunites some of the villains and has plans to get vengeance but in a more extreme way. One night, they set a trap for each of our heroes. And they've managed to capture them all. Later, Brian is watching TV not knowing what happened. Lois is trying to explain that the group love Brian, but then King Solar Flare bursts in and explained about what happened. But when Brian asks is there anything he can do, the King shares that he is the only one left who can save them. And warns him about a man who kidnaps dogs. With the villains, our heroes find themselves trapped in a huge prison bubble, is immune to magic, bullets, rockets, etc. Brian is still journeying. After knowing Brian is coming, Tirek plans for some surprises for Brian. Brian however, is still wondering. Then Tirek reveals that he hired Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, the Biskits, Sideshow Bob, Regirock, Registeel, Regice and the Carnotaurs to kill Brian. Then Brian arrives at a pub, with bikers then he encounter a group of bikers, and after stealing one's motorcycle and the bar owner's sunglasses. He sets off again. With the villains, Tirek plans to turn everyone to a hybrid statues. Meanwhile Brian, then reaches a cave to make for the night from a rainstorm in a cave, the fillies, the Biskits, Sideshow Bob, the Pokemon and the Carnotaurs attack. But Brian uses his .45 Colt and fires at some of the rocks above by causing a cave-in, killing the smaller Carnotaur, but the larger one and the other villains survive, leave and he roars, apparently in rage at the loss of its companion. Brian continues to drive for the villains' hideout but he now knows he might need to get a bigger weapon. Then he finds a pair of weapons. Then he sees a man with a mask and takes him to his pound. Brian wakes up and finds himself in a cage and sees that the man is sleeping, and tries to get the keys. At first he fails but then he Relatives *Peter Griffin (owner, best friend) *Lois Griffin *Meg Griffin *Chris Griffin *Stewie Griffin (2nd best friend) *Vinny Griffin (brother) * Sylveon (lover and later wife) *Biscuit (mother) *Unamed father *Jasper (cousin) *Ricardo(cousin-in-law) *Dylan (son) *Jerry (brother, deceased) Gallery Screen-Shot-2013-11-26-at-4.19.28-PM.png|Brian getting ran over and killed. (Although he is saved later.) Brian_Griffin99.png family-guy-brian-griffin-02.jpg Brian with Thomas and Twilight.jpg|Brian with Thomas and Twilight brian_griffin_as_a_pony_by_cartoonanimes4ever-d6vvntt.jpg|Brian Griffin as a unicorn Disney_Brian_by_BrianGriffinFan.jpg|Disney version of Brian hqd.jpg|Stewie going back in time to save Brian from The Car Driver Brian Griffin and Sylveon.png|Brian Griffin and Sylveon Trivia *Brian will meet and Join Thomas and Twilight in Thomas and Twilight Sparkle's Adventures of Family Guy: Brian & Stewie. *Brian Griffin's friends are Thomas and Twilight. *At the end of Thomas and Twilight Sparkle's Adventures of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Brian will stay with Luke. And he'll join the team again in Thomas and Twilight Sparkle's Adventures of Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope. * Brian also apparently has a human son named Dylan and a cousin named Jasper. *This is the only character for which Seth MacFarlane uses his natural speaking voice, as opposed to the voice changes for other characters such as Peter Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, and Stewie Griffin. *Seth MacFarlane has revealed that Brian is his favorite character. He say he feels comfortable while playing the part of Brian, he also has a picture of Brian to the side of his name on his office door. *Brian is infatuated with Lois and on more than one occasion has tried to have sex with her. *In "Brian: Portrait of a Dog", it's revealed that Brian became a Griffin during his adulthood, when Peter offered him a home with his family in Quahog, but in "The Man with Two Brians", Brian shows the family videos of him as a puppy, already living in the Griffin's house. *He drives a silver 2004 Toyota Prius., as it is seen in "The Juice Is Loose" pulling up on the Griffins' driveway while Stewie was stuck on the roof. The license plate reads "BRI-D0G" and it has a 'Kucinich 04'bumper sticker. *Brian is the first Family Guy character to appear in an episode American Dad!. He appears in "The People vs. Martin Sugar", where Stan names his top ten fictional dogs, and Brian is named number one. He is seen drinking a martini on the courthouse steps, and claims Stan does not exist. Stan berates him for the claim. *The DVD commentary for "Brian Griffin's House of Payne" explains that the "H" in "H. Brian Griffin" does not stand for anything and was a way to express Brian as a pretentious jerk. *Brian reveals in "Brian & Stewie" that he voted for John MCain. *Brian's catchphrase is "Whose leg do I have to hump to get a martini around here?" which originated in "I Never Met the Dead Man". This was varied three times later in the series in regards to different things. **O'Brian the sheep first uses a variation for a pint of Guinness in "Peter's Two Dads". **New Brian for a hug in "The Man with Two Brians". **Vinny Griffin for an Amaretto Disaronno in "Christmas Guy", though he replaces "hump" with "gagoosh". *Following his death in "Life of Brian", Brian is not even mentioned in "Into Harmony's Way", making it the only episode to date in which he doesn't appear. 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